Saturday, 1 February 2014


Jesus Christ, I don't know if I can do this any more. I don't know if I can watch another female singer shriek and scream her way through an audition and then spend 10 minutes watching her decide whose team to go on. Ladies and gentlemen - another week on The Voice.

Can you tell I'm feeling jaded by The Voice this week? Literally every single act I like, they don't turn for, and every single act I hate, they turn for and rave about as if they were the second coming. Plus, I think I have identified the fundamental flaw with the editing of this show: the 'choosing which coach to go with' part is so painfully drawn out. Who on earth on the BBC production team thought the public would care so much about this part? Why do we care which coach our favourite act picks? It doesn't affect whether we get to see them perform again, it doesn't really mean anything at this stage!

Highlight of the week: there was a woman whose shoes were made entirely of fruit! Yes, of fruit! She made some wearable chocolate shoes for Kylie, and I want to know how she knew her shoe size, and whether Kylie will wear them.

The Voice needs to start shaping up fast before it starts to lose the glow that Kylie and Ricky have brought with them. Stop the dragging out of every act. Stop the sob stories. Let's see more acts, and ooh, maybe a bit more male/female balance? By my rough calculations so far, we have about 24 girls and only 6 boys. The way things are going we are right on track for another Andrea Begley or Leanne whatshername. And I'm sure the BBC don't want that.

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