Saturday, 14 December 2013

The Moment It's All Been Leading Up To: The X Factor Final

Is this the most predictable X Factor final in history? Does Sam Bailey really have it in the bag or will her fans get complacent? And can Luke do enough to tackle Scotland and net 2nd place over Little Nicky? My blog is being written live tonight so in the words of Ellie and Luke, anything could, quite literally, 'appen'.

For me tonight it was all about the barmy contestants supergroup medley. I'm quite surprised I can still type this having been blinded by Rylan's new teeth, but nevertheless, I think we can all agree that a barmy contestant is what's been sadly missing from this series of X Factor. And this performance more than made up for that! From Wagner playing the bongos in a pirate hat, to Johnny Robinson in his snazzy silver NASA jacket, and Kitty Brucknell riding in on a wrecking ball a la Miley Cyrus, this was British bonkers at its best. Why don't they do this every year?

' I want Sam Daley to win' squeals an awkward looking girl in the audience. She's clearly there on some free corporate tickets and doesn't give a shit about the X Factor.

Here's my run down of the performances:

Nicholas McDonald 
'Candy' ranged from dire to bizarre and back to dire again. He looks so awkward doing upbeat, but when you add in the fact that it's a bit of a rubbish song, plus a distracting, manic troupe of Willy Wonka style dancers, it seems pretty obvious that the producers are trying to get rid of Little Nicky.

'Flying Without Wings' - Nicky's had a lot of flack in the press this week for being saddled with the poorest, most has-been celeb to duet with. However, it is the perfect song for his voting demographic, who love a nice cheesy ballad. It was very awkward the way Nicky and Shane appeared to be singing this lovingly to each other, but the grannies probably won't pick up on that, and will vote in droves for the nice wee Scottish lad and his nice wee ballad.

Luke Friend
'We Are Young' -
Oh Luke, why are you so much worse when you don't have your guitar? Oh Luke, why does your mentor give you songs that start in a really low register which you clearly can't manage? Sharon would have done a great job with Luke, whilst Louis makes it patently obvious that the only things that matter are as follows: 1) people like you 2) people will buy your records 3)you're young. I don't think Louis actually cares about music at all. I'm quite cross at him for his poor handling of Luke.

'Anything Could 'Appen' -
Nice to see them go for a duet partner that's a bit of a contrast/compliment instead of just thinking 'who does this person sound similar to?' Luke + Ellie = a match made in heaven. Their voices complimented each other beautifully and I really didn't want this song to end. This could net him a few more votes but he has a lot of catching up to do after his first performance let-down.

Sam Bailey
'Edge of Glory - A very bizzare prison set and Sam stopping awkwardly mid-performance to slide down a pole (something that can never be graceful from a non-gymnast 36 year old woman). However, this couldn't hold back the almighty Sam from another stunning vocal performance.

'And I Am Telling You'
Note to Ms Scherzinger: Love, we all know you can hold a big note for a long time, it doesn't make it pleasant to listen to. Nicole has a horrible, squealing tone to her voice. Then when Sam cuts in it's a massive relief, perhaps a ploy to make us realise how good Sam is? This was a bit of a 'battle of the divas', as I feared it would be.

And there you have it, the votes are in and it's all very predictable and safe. I'm not too bothered because all I wanted was for Luke to make the final. I have no doubt that he will do really well for himself now. I'm just a bit sad that tomorrow's final is going to be a bit bland now. Apparently people in the audience were booing at this result! Poor Nicky! Tune in tomorrow to find out who the 'lucky' winner of X Factor 2013 will be.

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